6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
