she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
