Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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