New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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