Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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