i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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