maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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