It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize