he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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