i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
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