three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
