My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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