He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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