Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
