Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize