omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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