Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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