She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
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