You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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