Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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