he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize