the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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