Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize