Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
