so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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