Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
