HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize