My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
