I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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