He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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