she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
