I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
even my farts smell like vagina
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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