There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
