id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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