She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
