I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
