...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I wish I only lived at night.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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