Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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