AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
