I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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