Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
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