Jerry, you need to find god
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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