Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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