the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
