He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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