Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
