STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
how drunk are you?
Several
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
