I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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