This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
