I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
